When the Support Matters...
š¦ With ears twitching and eyes wide, the deer detects danger in a heartbeat.
šæ Nervous but quick, the squirrelās constant vigilance keeps it one step ahead.
š¦ Swift and ever watchful, the antelope senses danger long before it strikes!Ā
Yes, itās all here too. I am confident about these earned senses I have ,over the last 10 years. While no two days are identical, they often appear similar - constantly looking out for unknowns to deal with.Ā
No choice, but to deal with them!
Every day has its ups and downs. The dependencies are massive. The uncertainties are huge. Every sunrise brings out a new me - not always positive, not always negative. The day can turn in any direction in just minutes(seconds, to be honest). There is no plan but yes hell a lot of background preparation is in place! Backup they call it.
This is a reflection of what I have become over the years after falling multiple times and getting up again for another damn setback. There is no 9 to 6 paid job. There is no standard homemaker role. There are no āAh, thank god itās a weekendā moments. There is a mix of everything you can think of under the sun. If I have to update my resume today, guess my powers will be āsleeping with one eye openā and āpredicting chaos before it happensā!
I donāt want to totally portray ācaregivingā as a constant struggle. It does haveĀ many rewarding aspects associated with it too. It does have its joy and fulfillment in its way. It has taught me toughness, patience (little more than the zero I had earlier), and a heightened sense of awareness. It has sharpened my ability to assess situations and make decisions under pressure. The years haveĀ developed empathy in me, making me more aligned with the needs of others! Yes, the best thing ever happened to me out of all this is understanding this word- āempathyā.Ā
Some days will be the role of teacher, guardian, helper, friend, analytical expert, cleaner, cook, driver, caretaker, dragon, nurse, therapist, bodyguard,host etc. Itās exhausting, juggling too many roles and still feeling like something's missing. But amidst all the chaos, thereās that small ray of hope that keeps one going, a belief that stability is just around the corner. Even when it feels incomplete, you hang on, knowing that some peace will eventually come your way.Ā
Takeaway - The caregiversā fatigue is for real, particularly in emergency or life-threatening situations. The constant demands can leave you feeling wiped out, and it can be pretty lonely when others don't get what you are going through. The emotional toll of witnessing suffering day after day can lead to anxiety, guilt, and even a loss of identity as they devote themselves entirely to someone else's well-being!
The "taker" will find their way eventually, but I hope the "caregiver" still will have the strength to hold on until then! Here, the support system matters. A LOT. An army of genuinely understanding people are a boon for that one critical caregiver facing the full-on brunt. It matters.
I have been meaning to share this for a while but wasn't sure how it would go over.Ā Well, do you know any caregivers personally? In family, friends?Ā
First thing - Reach out to them. Call them - don't WhatsApp. Ask how are they doing.Ā Trust me, you will make a difference.
Share this article with them and convey my deepest respect!Ā
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Comments ( 2 )
Sayali Kasar
3 days ago
I got goosebumps reading this. I feel the caregiver in many ways goes through the suffering as much as and maybe in many ways more than the patient. I have seen my father get into the role of a caregiver full time post his retirement for around two years for my grandfather. He had lost his sense of self and what you mentioned - empathy and putting the other person first sometimes becomes so much that the caregiver empties himself. Reaching out to the caregiver and making sure his cup is full to pour from is so important!
jaee jadhav
3 days ago
Ah, this parent-kid thing is a long term unconditional give and take, right? We are talking decades here, like 50 or 60 years sometimes. Over time, the roles flip aroundāsometimes you're the giver, sometimes the taker. It's a bond that's on a whole other level, with emotions running super high!
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