Carnival 

Go on the Ferris wheel. It will be fun. 

I was dreading it from the moment his mom had told them they were going to the travelling carnival that had pitched up on the open grounds close to the house. 

Maybe she wanted to get out of the house. Have something different to do. 

You boys go on the giant wheel and then we can get some makkey ki roti and sarson ka saag. 

My dread had started seeping in hours before it happened.

When I and my brother stood in line for the wheel, the diesel smoke reminded me of the fact that I had been thinking about it all day. 

I climbed into the wheel - the small enclosure seemingly like a prison and not at the same time. 

As the wheel got faster and faster, the dread kept rising. 

And then I popped. My lunch and the evening snack were on the floor of the prison. 

My head kept spinning. I had to get hold. 

When the wheel stopped, we jumped out as quickly as we could and ran away. 

Never looked back. 

Found mom - I asked her to take me home and comfort me. Never leaving her side. 

She sat with me as I washed and recovered. 

With disappointment brimming her eyes. The saag and roti that she dreamt of. For days. \

She had no stomach for it anymore. 

Neither of us spoke on the walk back home. We could see it in her eyes. 

The dimly lit streets were familiar and strange - they looked like distant cousins of the daytime view. 

Dad came home from work - tired and weary. Mom served him food and set our plates. She got some too. 

That night she didn't tell Dad everything that happened through the day. Or what happened in the afternoon soap operas. 

She did not ask him for his opinions on the social ongoings. Or the family budget for the week. 

That night she closed her eyes and lay still until sleep found her.